fall on your knees

This year, our church created Bethlehem in our gym. It's really neat.. there are shops and smells and authentic food. You walk in and have to pay taxes. There is a breadmaker, a woodcarver, a temple, a school, a potter, an apothecary.. It really is just like a village of Bethlehem.

And with Bethlehem, comes Mary and Joseph and the baby Jesus. Somehow I became the one to be Mary.. so I just went with it. Well, even though I begged and pleaded, no one seemed willing to give me their small child to be a real baby Jesus outside the past two nights. Understandable, it was arctic freezing temperatures out there.

So, for the past two nights, I have been the Virgin Mary outside with a Joseph and a baby doll playing Jesus. Don't worry, the baby doll has done a fantastic job. There are also real animals outside (read: for any child younger than 25, a petting zoo). This drastically limits the amount of people who actually want to see Mary and Joseph and baby Jesus. Granted, the kids always get a little disappointed when they realize He is a baby doll and not a real baby. The parents just smile sympathetically and ask if we are warm. Um, it's 27 degrees outside and we are all from Mississippi.. of course we are not warm. But thanks for asking.

Last night, about halfway through our three hour stint outside, a family with two girls comes outside. They beeline it to the animals and pet the donkey (whose name is Caroline) and feed the cow. The older girl makes her way into the stable with her mom close behind her. This sweet girl had some type of physical and mental disability.. it was evident in her gait and her speech. But when her mom asked her if she knew who the baby in my arms was.. y'all, get ready for this...

.. she fell to her knees in front of the manger

Fell to her knees in a reverent form of worship for this baby doll baby Jesus.

Her mom nodded in praise and her daughter pulled her mom down to her knees with her. They stayed like that for a few seconds then the little girl stood up and came over and petted baby Jesus's head. (ha!)

But this is what I will remember from that... when she realized who that baby was, she IMMEDIATELY fell to her knees to worship Him.

How quickly do we rush past the nativity scene because we have seen it so often? Even in the past two nights of having the blessing of being Virgin Mary.. I can only imagine what it truly must have been like for her to hold Jesus as shepherds and Wise Men, alike, came to see and worship the baby. The words "and Mary pondered all those things in her heart" gained a new meaning for me that last two days.

I pray this Christmas season that we pause long enough to fall on our knees in front of the Lord Jesus who is ever worthy of our praise and our very lives.

when I grow up....

I'm going to be a doctor! For real, though, y'all.

I GOT INTO MEDICAL SCHOOL!!!!!

I was accepted to medical school at the University of Mississippi Medical Center last Friday.. November 18, 2011.

It's a funny story, really. I've only wanted to be a doctor for well, the past 12 years of my life.. and this being the third time I had applied to medical school, I was becoming concerned that perhaps this wasn't really the path God desired for my life. He does that sometimes, you know. He changes you and your dreams and desires. I had even applied to nursing school, and taken classes at MSU to make that a possibility.

Then came the invitation to interview for medical school. That came in email form on October 17.. I was excited, yet tried not to dwell upon it because I knew (all too well) that they could say "no" again. So, I prepared as best I could, wore a great suit with rounded toe shoes (Ann claims that made all the difference! Whereas Clay Taylor says it was all in the eyeliner!) and interviewed my little heart out.

On November 17th. That's when I interviewed. For the third time. I didn't feel any different going into it.. only I knew that was the last time. If I hadn't gotten in that time, I wasn't going to apply again. I talked and laughed and expressed my love and passion for humankind (or tried to) and specifically for medicine. I suppose it went well?

I was cautioned that I may not hear back the next day, like usual because they were behind and had been out of town. (they = the admissions committee). So, on Friday when I hadn't heard anything by 12:30, I assumed they must not have discussed me and it was going to be two more weeks before I heard. Hard realization but nothing cheese dip and a coke couldn't fix.. so Raysha and I headed to eat Mexican in Ridgeland.
(correction: we headed to eat fancy, in brick restaurant Mexican.. apparently, there is a difference)


No sooner had we sat down at our table and the waiter appeared (in a tie, no less) to ask us for our drink orders, my email refreshed and one popped up that said "Congratulations" in the subject heading. That, my friends, is the secret code to "you got into medical school.. open me, open me"!! What excitement.. I began an ugly type of cry that probably made people think my dog had died or else I really hated Mexican. I began to incoherently talk to Raysha and hit her on the arm an exceedingly numerous amount of times before she decided I was making a scene and we should probably leave the restaurant. Good call, there.. I needed fresh air and wide open spaces.

Once outdoors, Raysha hugged me and spun me around.. I kept my ugly cry going.. I'm not a pretty crier.. I'm just not.

I was able to call my Mom, Cole, Kim Parker and Dell Taylor before the boyfriend and bffff made the news go global.. which was slightly overwhelming but yet so exciting! I had phone calls coming in from other countries.. literally! Laura Loftin called me from Ecuador.. what a surprise! She walked beside me so many steps in this journey; it was a joy to hear from her and share my excitement with her.
After having a slight breakdown and panic attack (hey, sometimes I get super overwhelmed and happy about good news.. it just happens), I ate some coke and cheese dip (turns out it can be used as celebratory lunch too) and a cupcake. I had so many calls and text messages.. it was incredible. What an outpouring of love and support.

I cannot say it enough times: I am thankful to every single person who has encouraged me, supported me, even just chatted with me about my desire to be a doctor. Thank you for how you all have inspired me to keep going, even when all I wanted to do was give up. I have the best friends and family I could ask for.. and am so incredibly blessed. Please just don't stop loving and supporting me now. Here comes another difficult part: getting through medical school! So keep the encouragement and support coming!

I am incredibly overjoyed to be able to type this blog post.. it's been two years in the making. Which leads me to another sappy story. Two years ago, the best friend EVER, bought me two cards. One was a "I'm so happy you got into medical school" card and one was a "They are dumb and don't know what they're missing out on.. why don't you get a dog now" card. Since I have Baxter and only recently a medical school acceptance, we all know which card I received two years ago... however, that same best friend saved the happy card and gave it to me on Friday. It literally makes me cry as I type that. Because I am overwhelmed by her belief and support in me.. that I would one day get into medical school. To keep that card.. in the midst of moving three times in the past two years, it never got thrown away. That kind of support is what is going to make me an incredible student and push me to become the best doctor I can be.

Here are a few pictures of the fun celebratory night..

fun, exciting faces!!

what a fantastic best friend. thanks for never giving up on me. and never getting rid of that card. :) 

I love these two.. so so much.

that little girl has my heart. 

you are a great friend.. thank you!

Don't we all long for this?

These verses have been echoing in my head for the past week.. isn't this what we are all looking for? A little rest? Someone who knows more than we do and can show us how it's done? That's what I'm looking for these days, anyway. And I have to remember that there is Someone who knows it all. And so wants to show me.. if only I would take the time to listen.

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
-Jesus 
Matthew 11:28, The Message 


amen. 

standing for.... ?

these words to this praise song have echoed in my head all week.. and I wonder.. what exactly am I standing for?

"so I'll stand, with arms high and heart abandoned in awe of the One who gave it all, I'll stand.. my soul, Lord, to You surrendered.. all I am is Yours"

how much of myself am I willing to stand before Him? just the part that is convenient? ... or every part? regardless of the cost?

I pray it's the latter... but I must confess, I think He is still working in my heart to get me there.

Life as of lately.....

so lately, life has been interesting. God has really been teaching me a lot.. and challenging me in new ways. I am learning how to live simply on my own.. with no roommates to entertain me or cook for me! (Dianna and Laura, I am really missing you two these days!!) Baxter and I have routines that work for us and I spend most of my time either at work, school or doing homework.

I'm trying to take advantage of spare time that I have... to spend it outdoors or reading books or watching TV shows that I missed because I don't have a TV/cable. These are a few pictures I took two weekends ago.. a weekend that two years ago absolutely changed my life. I've healed a lot since then.. and spent some time that weekend "fall cleaning", running, hanging out with baxter and watching aforementioned TV shows .. grey's anatomy.. private practice.. modern family.. just to name a few! I also spent some time just thinking about the time since that terrible fall, Friday afternoon. I appreciate time so much more.. I appreciate my body and all that it does for me. I'm careful about what I put into it.. because I want it to last for a long, long time. I appreciate my dad and who he was.. and it makes me sad that he's not around to see who I am today. 

Here are a few pictures I took that weekend.. just of what I did. 

Sweet MSU... I've spent lots of time out at that place. I love it so much. It will always be home to me. 

This crazyyyyy puppy dog, whom I adore. He is so funny!!

And was really into the north farm. 

He wouldn't turn around for a single picture.. he was so excited to be out and about. 

He shows me how to live out John 10:10.. abundant and full life. 

He is such a happy one.. continually joyful.. with good reason, his life IS pretty cushy!

I love magazines. Magazines and coke are my vices. 

And that was my night. ABC online, some sushi, coke from McDonalds (because they give you more drink for less money than Umi does)

The beginning of October is always a little weird... I am reminded of the past two years and what I was doing on those days those years. I'm healing.. truly healing and really listening to the Lord right now about His plans for my life. 

This may be a little long .. but I need to talk it out. Recently, I've been convicted about my dreams and desires. Whether they were selfishly from me or whether my heart really was to please the Lord. It's all I've ever wanted to do... simply love Him with my life. Even now in this in between time, I want so badly to do just that. 

And I began to wonder if this idea of medical school was planted by Him in my heart... or whether my plain, simple notion of wanting to help others somehow was developed by other, good-meaning folks into a doctor. You see, growing up, I was usually one of the smartest in my class. I just was.. I tried hard and I made good grades. I was ambitious, a little obnoxious, very take-charge and had (have) a classic type-A, take-charge personality. I love the idea of being a doctor.. of curing cancer.. of truly helping. Then slowly, that dream became harder and harder to reach. MCAT's didn't turn out as hoped... rejection letters came in plural form, not singular.. and my dream seemed unattainable. Slowly, my heart began to wonder.. is this truly what God has planned for me? Are these doors closing on their own or is there a Hand slowly closing them? 

And then I began to ask myself what I wanted to do.. simple question. But one I don't think about a lot. I am a people pleaser to the nth degree. I have worked my whole life for others to be proud of me.. which consequently makes me proud of myself. I realized: I want to help. I want to talk to patients, spend time with them not just the 5 minutes in rounds or the 10 minutes in the office setting, build relationships, have a family.. spend time with my children and husband.. I want time to pour into a church, take mission trips, sit and play with my kids at night, coach their sports teams. 

If October 2, 2009, taught me anything.. it was about time. That we need to use what we have wisely.. our time with how we take care of our bodies and how we react and respond and relate to those around us. I want my time to make Him smile. And perhaps.. that can be accomplished better by being a nurse, than the doctor. Perhaps I'm not settling or limiting myself. Perhaps I'm fulfilling His perfect plan. If He doesn't have it planned where MD will follow my last name, then so be it. 

Through these past two years I've learned.. I'd rather stand by His side in a lifetime of rain than away from Him in the sun. Even if my future looks nothing at all like I planned, the fact that He is planning, not me, gives me great comfort. 

Will you be praying for me? For the Lord's words and wisdom to work in my life and in my heart? For me to be able to discern what exactly He is calling me to next? 

These simple, plain, heartfelt words of Ginny Owens echo in my heart and I pray, in my life. 

"all I wanna do is give this life to You

all I wanna do is give this life to You

all I wanna do is give this life to You

and let Your will be done

til it's all I wanna do" 

This Saturday night I should be studying anatomy.. because I have a test on Tuesday over 5 chapters of material. And it's probably going to be hard. Instead... I ate dinner with a friend, played on facebook, and stumbleupon. And now I'm blogging. 

Because I haven't blogged in months. I always come up with great things that I should blog about. Case in point: 

1. Trip to Disney World

2. One year anniversary with the boyfriend

3. Taking classes at MSU

4. Work - there are always funny things happening up there

5. Life, in general 

Somehow, blogging gets put on the back burner. Generally to my homework. Because that's due at a certain time. Butttttt, since I'm already procrastinating this studying thing, I may as well blog for a while. 

So, I went to Disney World back in June with Laura Kathryn, Stephen and Cole. SO SO SO much fun. We had such a blast... from the car ride with random music, to seeing my family in Mobile, to riding all the rides we could think of and seeing tons of great fireworks. It was an incredible trip. What a way to celebrate being finished studying for/ taking the MCAT. It was such a blessing of a vacation. 

Cole and I celebrated one year of dating.. that was fun. We both did our favorite things that day. He golfed and I layed out! Then we had a fun dinner date at The Grill.. yummyyyy. He has since gone back to school, worked A TON, been a great Kappa Sig president, and is, at the present time, in Belize on vacation. But no worries, I'm not jealous or anything. Because, you know, I don't really like sun, or beaches, or exploring, or crystal blue water.... but if I liked any of those things, I might be jealous. 

I am taking some classes at MSU this fall. 3 to be exact. Human Anatomy, Sociology and Nutrition. It appears as if God is possibly closing the door to medical school.. I'm not sure yet. Still praying hard about it and listening for His voice. But these classes will give me the ability to apply to Physician Assistant school and Accelerated Nursing School... both which seem very appealing to me right now. 

Work has been very busy lately.. but I so enjoy the girls I work with. I'm pretty sure collectively we all gain about 5 lbs a week.. because we have little self control and love junk food! Just Friday, we went to McDonald's twice... because we are going to win Monopoly and $1,000,000.. y'all just watch out. It's going to be ours. Because even one million dollars split 5 ways is a lot of money! 

Life in general includes me and Baxter... who is getting bigger by the day. He spends two days a week at his friend Cosmo's house for "daycare". And he loves it! He has so much fun over there... he practically bounces up and down when I tell him we are going over there. It's been such a blessing to be able to take him over there on those days, because I stay at work all day (no lunch break) so I can go to class in the afternoon. 

I think that might be all the big stuff... all the catch up stuff anyway. I'm going to post some pictures below from the last couple months.. 

fun at disney! Cole is veryyyy proud of that braid across my forehead. 

What a cute Viking boy. 

Sweet Stephy!! So glad I ran into her.. and got to hang out with her. 

my sweet trio of disney friends... thanks for putting up with me, guys!

he is a disney trooper with me in tow. 

ahhh!! that's cinderella's house! she lives there. she is super cool. 

fun day. 

precious college freshman. all grown up. 

TEACUPS!!!!!

yes, I'm well aware that I look like a five year old. 

he's funny to have around. ... funny looking....

sweet Suzanne.. what a fun toy story ride with you!

my sweet, sweet 7th graders. I can't believe they have graduated from Faith Factory!

hello boyfriend. happy one year. 

fun out at the country club. with the bros. 

Sunday lunch at Grandmother's house. my precious girls. 

Taylor Swift concert!!

Needtobreathe opened for them!!

Look! There's Taylor.. playing the piano.. "back to december"

so.. it's been a pretty eventful couple months. I'll try not to go so long between posts. I think Chelsea and Cole were about to usurp me from blogger and take over for me. Maybe they'll let me hang around now..... 

:) 

-k. 

Long Time, No Blog

It's been quite a while since I have sat down to blog. And it's not for lack of things to share.. my life has been super busy the last month, especially. 


And so, I'm going to try to eventually catch up on blogging. My last blog I wanted to talk about Lent.. I absolutely adore Lent. Perhaps that's because in high school we had a Lent prayer breakfast where our youth group would read a book and meet early early Thursday mornings to talk about what the Lord was teaching us through it. I loved doing that. I enjoyed being in community with others and I really loved the weeks when we had french toast casserole for breakfast. 


With that being said... it has obviously been a while since I was in high school. Lent is quite different now. I remember it as a time to draw closer to the Lord.. this year I gave up coca-cola and spent time every night intentionally praying and journaling. 
And honestly? It was a hard 40 days.. a lot of things happened that made me want a coke so bad. That time each night that I would spend with the Lord though.. I remembered that THAT is what Lent is about... that's what God is about.. He is all about a relationship with us. He so longs to know us on an intimate level.. I know He is God and all and created us. I just think He also wants us to long to know Him.. for us to tell Him about our day and our heart. 
I learned a lot more about that this Lenten season.. 


I have many more things to post about but those will just have to wait for now!

In the real world....

... there is no such thing as spring break. This past week has been one of the most exhausting, tiring, difficult, hard (pretty much insert any hard word into this sentence) one I've had at work thus far. I mean, I've had difficult days.. but never 5 in a row! I was definitely glad when the weekend came around.

My 48 hours of spring break.. as I liked to call the weekend.

I've wanted to post on my blog since maybe Monday night? I even started a post but never had time to finish it because I've been MCAT studying every night this week. I would go to work for about 9 hours.. come home and just lay on my bed out of sheer exhaustion, then get up, eat dinner and study for an hour or two. I even titled my post "MCAT studying sucks".
I just hope all this studying is going to pay off. I guess we'll see.. less than 3 months from now I take it again. I've gone all the way through the General Chemistry lectures and started on Physics lectures about a week ago. And then each day I've been reading a Verbal Reasoning passage. Those last two sentences don't really matter to any of you though do they? Hah. Just a quick recap of the studying... to prove I'm actually doing something!!

I realized it had been a while since I posted pictures so I wanted to do that too. A little over a month ago I had the privilege of staffing The Journey where I worked closely with two girls all weekend and we just bonded. The tripod.. as we called ourselves.

Please excuse the fact that I look terrible. I hadn't showered in a looonngggg time.. something I'm generally not into but during The Journey no one really showers. 

Anyway.. fantastic weekend. I love these precious girls. It really was amazing how close the Lord brought us in a matter of hours and the way that our friendship grew over the weekend. I feel very blessed to know them. 

Another fun thing I've done recently was attend Kappa Sigma Founders Day at Delta State with the ole boyfriend.. who just happens to be Kappa Sig president. We had such a fun time at dinner.. Cole even gave a speech and I was able to meet all his friends, which I really enjoyed. We realized no one had taken our picture that night so we used the self timer and photographed ourselves!! Here are a few shots: 

This is after dinner.. which like I said was very yummy and fun!

This is after we got back from the party.. he said why don't you jump and let's take a picture. And I said okay! :)

And this is a picture of the award that Cole got at dinner.. Let me help you out with the caption:

The Most Wanted man on Campus

In recognition of Cole Andrews

Being voted Mr. DSU

Number One, Second to None

Founders Day 2011

Did I mention my boyfriend is Mr. DSU? I'm superrrr proud! It's okay to be jealous.. I mean, I would understand. He's probably a little embarrassed that all that is now out on the internet for anyone to find. But hey, when you're in the spotlight.. you're in the spotlight.

Something else that has happened recently is I turned 23... yeppp.. the big 2-3. It doesn't really feel any different? I'm not sure that it was supposed to. It was a great birthday though.. full of a little work.. great time with the boyfriend.. time spent outdoors and a fun birthday dinner. The day before my roommates and friends and I had a party at my apt with strawberry cupcakes. It was fun.. even Baxter loved it. But he didn't get a cupcake!

This is the only picture I have from my actual birthday.. Laura Kathryn took pictures at the birthday party but I have yet to see those. 

 I just adore him. :)

I think those are all the big things. I want to blog about Lent a bit.. but that's for another time!

I'm still learning..

Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. 

Don't think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing. 

Your attitude should be the same that Christ Jesus had. 

Though he was God, he did not demand and cling to his rights as God.

He made himself nothing; he took the humble position of a slave and appeared in human form.

And in human form he obediently humbled himself even further by dying a criminal's death on a cross. 

Because of his, God raised him up to the heights of heaven and gave him a name that is above every other name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. 

-- Philippians 2: 3-11

Incredibly convicting words that Paul wrote.. I'm still learning how to have such a humble, selfless, giving attitude in all that I do. I am also reminded in these verses of how much praise and glory we should give Jesus Christ. "Every knee will bow" is what it says... so often I don't bow in reverent worship enough. 

Holy Holy Holy 

is the Lord God Almighty

Who was and is and is to come

With all creation I sing

Praise to the King of Kings

You are my everything

And I will adore You

Learning to bloom where I'm planted..

In my last post, I said that I had shared my spiritual journey for the college students at The Journey. I had to use multiple scriptural references.. which meant narrowing it down a lot. There's so many verses that talk about God's support and His love for us, etc.

I talked about Jeremiah 29:11... and I talked about how we can't take that verse out of context. So I looked it all up and read about the Israelites and what they were experiencing in Jeremiah 29.  Turns out, he (jeremiah) was writing a letter to them from God. Because God always used messengers... His people were afraid to look at Him, they were afraid they would die. (do we still feel that way sometimes? That we don't want to look Him in the face? you know, because of the sacrifice of Jesus, we have the great privilege of being able to do that)

Anyway, in Jeremiah 29, God's people had been exiled from Jerusalem (their land) to Babylon (NOT their land). Crazy king Neb (shortening), who in my head will always be the crazy king from Veggie Tales who built a big chocolate bunny statue that he wanted everyone to worship. Crazy king Neb had exiled these Israelites from their rightful home to his land in Babylon. Back then... power was seen in people. And probably sheep or something like that.

God has sent this letter to the exiled people and I can hear them draw in a breath as someone starts to read the letter. I'm sure they are all praying that it's a battle plan.. a plan to get them home that day in time for dinner and their favorite TV show (well... maybe not THAT..). But a plan for them to get out of Babylon and back to Jerusalem.. their rightful home.

Yet... that's not at all what this letter said. God told them to make themselves comfortable. He told them to make homes, plant gardens, get married, have kids and let them get married! Basically, they weren't coming home yet. This was going to be their home for a while... a long while... 70 years to be exact. And after that exact amount of time had passed, He was going to come get them, rescue them and bring them back to Jerusalem. He explicitly tells them that He knows exactly what He is doing. Even though this is not at all what they wanted. I'm sure, more than anything, they just wanted to go home. To go back to normal. To go back to the time before life was so crazy and out of whack. But God says otherwise... He tells them to settle in. Learn to deal with it... but even more than deal with it, He calls them to make this new place their home and to enjoy it.
It wasn't what they wanted.. at all. He tells them to pray for Babylon and pray for it's leaders and such. That if things are going well for Babylon, things will go well for them too. If I were those exiled I would pray for Babylon simply under selfishness.. that I would want things to go well for me!

After reading the whole chapter.. it puts verse 11 in different context. God is saying that often, our life is not what we expect it to be. That verse sounds so happy.. that God has good plans for us and for our future. So often, we assume those good, happy plans will be the ones that we made. 9 times out of 10 it's not. It's not the plans we made for ourselves... it's the ones that God had for us. Which so often look different than what we would plan.

Maybe it's living in a town you never thought you'd be in. Or it's working at a job where you are miserable. Or it's the unknown of not knowing where to go to school. Or what to do with your life. Or how to get what you want out of life.

This chapter spoke so loudly to me in my life now. I am under such a longing for what I thought my life would include.. medical school.. a dad.. married parents.. a life outside of Starkville perhaps? What I have to remember is that this is the life that the Lord has blessed me with. And you know what? I truly do love every minute of it. yes, it's hard.. parts are not so fun. Beyond that though... God has brought me to this place, and said "Be yourself here. Get used to it. Make roots and bloom where you are planted. And in my time, I will uproot you and bring you back to where you belong."

The amazing thing though about that promise is the timing... in 70 years, all these exiled people hearing this letter would be dead. They would never get to go back to Jerusalem. God was going to call them Home before they make it back to their homeland.
Our lives may never get back to that track where we saw them .. we may get called Home before then. This Babylon, though? It can be our home. Truly it can. The Lord has put us here and told us, not asked us, but told us to make roots.. let them grow deep and to get settled. And to remember in the midst of all the people who will say that He is not in this or doesn't exist in our Babylons.. He asks us to remember His God degree. To remember exactly who He is.

He is the one who parted the Red Sea.
The one who sent a flood and after that a rainbow.
He is the one who came in the still small voice.
He is the one who sent His son.
He is one who loved us until the death.

He is the one who says this: "I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out - plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for."

A Warm Day in February

If you live anywhere near Mississippi, you are probably doing something revolving the outdoors today. It is simply beautiful out there. Temperatures hovering near the 70's, bright sun out and a sky as blue as the ocean. I love it.

I am inside today.. in my apartment fighting some sort of random sickness that has robbed my body of all energy and dictated that I sleep 16 hours a day. Oh, and I have a sore throat. Who knows what this mystery sickness may be.

I do know that nothing slows me down quicker than being sick.

I spent this past weekend in Jackson helping with a college retreat called The Journey.. such a refreshing weekend of meeting new friends, getting to know people better, having the courage and strength to stand up in front of a crowd and share my spiritual journey.. only to come back and be sick for two days.. even missing work.. which I rarely do.

So.. to catch you up on the past month of my life.. I did get a Macbook Pro. I love it so so much. Yes, I have received my MCAT materials and even started studying Monday night but took yesterday off because I felt so yucky. We'll see how it goes tonight.

The past month continues to bring situations to my life where I must lay my life at the feet of Jesus and trust that He simply knows best. He knows best for my future.. for where I should live or work next year.. for who should be a part of my life.. and He knows best to slow me down so that I don't live life at a breathtaking neck breaking speed. He slows me down enough so that I must listen to Him and quiet my soul.

I have contemplated many things today as I lay in my bed and rest while Baxter rests in his kennel (on his own accord!). On days when it is pretty outside, I feel so much closer to the Lord... like He has reached down and made this day beautiful just for me.
In a book that I am reading right now, it talks about how worship is a way of life.. not just a word that we use to describe the singing portion of a service on Sunday morning. It also talks about how everything created was created to make us worship. The sky as blue as a ocean? created so we would stop and worship the Lord. Birds singing and the sun shining? Created so we would stop and worship the Lord.
I think days like this cause us to slow down a little and bring glory to the Creator of all things. For our sakes, I hope we remember this truth even on the days when the sun doesn't shine as brightly and maybe the birds don't sing.

That we remember exactly we were created to do... we were created to worship Christ the King.
Christ the Creator.
Christ the Redeemer.
Christ our Savior.

.. come and worship.. come and worship.. worship Christ the newborn King..

new year.. new goals..

Okay so the year is already 11 days in.. so perhaps the phrase "new year" has come and gone. And with it so many fun things. A crazy rain storm new years night, MSU winning the Gator Bowl.. or should I say pulverizing Michigan? Yes, let's go with pulverizing Michigan! The new year has also brought a purchase of MCAT studying materials (which should arrive soon) and the hope of the purchase of a new computer (Macbook Pro all the wayyy for apt 8!).

The newest fun thing that this year brought was a snow storm to sweet Starkville which put my friends out of school for a day and put me out of work for a day and a half.. glorious, glorious times. We played and played in the snow (after we got done complaining that it wasn't snowing enough..). My friends and I walked to campus with Baxter in tow and pelted each other with snowballs along the way, tried out many sledding hills on the way there til finally settling on the biggest hill in town (or so we thought) behind the MSU postoffice. We acted like a bunch of 5 year olds.. sliding down the hill and sprinting back up. Definitely the most fun of the year thus far! I decided I want to live somewhere that it snows some during the year. Not feet and feet of snow, but definitely a couple inches every now and then.

I am slowly embracing the idea of MCAT studying every night. I began tonight reading one of the workbooks that was emailed to me.. with the assurance that a hard copy was soon to follow. This semester will be quite different from the last as I spend most of my time after work studying instead of simply giving in to whatever I wanted to do any given night. I keep reminding myself that by acing this test I am one step closer to my dream.. and I am counting on you guys to remind me of that too! Daily, if need be!!

The other thing I hope this new year brings is a newfound closeness between me and Jesus. I so enjoy talking to Him as I go throughout my day.. and I enjoy reading books about different views of Christianity and such. It is such a blessing in my life these days to have time to do that.. to read whatever type of books I want.

Last but not least.. I should share some pictures of my last couple weeks!

sweet Raysha and I at a wedding.. and now she is married.. whoa!!

the boyfriend.. you would not believe how hard we had to try to get a good picture (insert some kind of joke here....)

partial small group reunion over christmas! we missed you drew!

Merry Christmas family!

this sweet puppy dog still holds my heart

I will try to blog more these days.. but I really make no promises seeing as how most of the things I would blog about would be MCAT related.. and probably not very interesting to anyone but myself. Nevertheless, I shall try!